Bonjour Mr Tim Tam!

Next time you go to the grocery store.
NAY before you continue to read this blog entry please PLEASE go out and purchase a package of cookies, I promise its within your best interest.
They are called Tim Tam's
I recommend Dark chocolate as I am a sucker for dark chocolate.

This part is important - their is very specific etiquette to eating this little morsels of heaven. The last thing you'd ant to do is offend someone who is. . . well lets say a Tim Tam pro (* On a slightly grosser side note you'd be apauled at how fast I can wolf half a pack of these puppies back. wowza! )
And so what if you dont come across tim tam experts often, this can be a cool party trick and you'll be the envy of all your friends.
I've taken some pictures to help demonstrate. . .lets see if ic an make them work now. . .
be nice, it was my day off and yes I enjoyed rolling around in pyjamas all day except when i went to the beach and burnt my legs in a very awkward way where half of each is burnt with a straight line from where i was sitting . . . the classic " oh this ? ha ha ha it doesn't hurt and yes i know it looks funny and no im not from around here and no that isn't my skin peeling off im just shedding, we do that in canada ha ha ha! im ging home to cry now and rub aloe on the scarlet pigment that is my body hee hee hee"
oh being burnt.
OK here it goes:











Ah the Tim Tam (in the back round you will notice a green key chain from the sushi restaurant that made me a preferred customer. so good. and surf wax, also so good )

pretty girl, pretty cookie

Step 1 - bite off just the corner of the timmy tammy

see?

Step 2 - repeat to OPPOSITE side. that is very important.






MORE TO COME! xo

an Ode to our kitchen sink.

we are not friends.
Now kitchen sink I realize that in fact we are little more than strangers but lets be serious for a minute here.
you're something of a jerk and I don't appreciate it. not one bit.
Today I attacked the pile of dishes anxiously sitting and waiting on your steel side surface. The pile, eager to be plopped into the hot soapy bath water ( which for dishes I figure is very spa like, giant hot bath, a cleaning, brush massage, hot water rinse off and a relaxing air dry in a rack. a RACK for heavens sake! that's like a bed for them!)
I digress.
As I go about preparing the day spa for our dishes, I patiently wait while the water turns to hot water. . . BUT as per usual, and what seems to be the case with almost every faucet in Australia that I've come across (* and ESPECIALLY in our apartment) the water always taps out (see what i did there. . . TAPS . . .a ha! I'll stop.) at luke warm. tops.

Now sink, I understand. sometimes it really must be a challenge to work up the energy to heat water. I also understand that it is not necessarily your fault for the lack of hot water and that this might be simply a shooting of the proverbial messenger but sink, do you have ANY idea how frustrating it is to wash dishes in water that isn't even hot enough to cook a hot dog in?! and not only that but dishes take FOREVER to dry when you rinse them with cool water! ( I would too if I took cold showers . . . oh wait.)

but thats nothing compaired to your pressure.
Now I'm all for fun and jokes and yes the first four times you gushed water so hard that it soaked my shirt and got me in the face were a little less than hilarious but in the opposite direction, the sucking force of the water leaving our sink in enough to rip the skin right off your hands. I think my hands have less freckles on them now then when I started. I am convinced in fact that the sheer brute force of our sink's draining system is what most people refer to as the EAC (East Australian Currant) its really the only explanation . . .

So Sink here it is. I just don't think that its going to work between us. its not you, its me.
no
wait
it is you.
But I think you're a really special person . . . and I promise to still come around but lets just focus on being professional and cordial, I promise not to curse and loath you if you just do what you can to make this a fast, and hot experience for both of us.

Sincerely,

Katie May

the happiest honey in the comb

This week - very good week.

Two days ago we hit up Maroubra beach to surf. it was an absolutely beautiful day filled with sun and sand and waves. Now i'm not going to try and make it seem like i'm some sort of surf prodigy. I am not. I certainly am not.
But I did get up on my knees a few times! which was an accomplishment on its own.
Maybe it was the chocolate milkshake before hand (*which in retrospect was not a good idea) but or dear Jillian wasn't as lucky with the waves. . . but even with a few hits to the noggin (*Thats what I call your head, your tete, melon etc ) she did tremendously well and we are both very excited to go out again.
THAT BEING SAID!!!

*****EXCITING NEWS BREAK

I bought a surfboard.
YES YES YES AND WIN TO THE MAX.
It is beautiful.
Its Light blue, 7 ft
I got it for a STEAL
AND haggled the price down 50 bucks.
Board, leash, wax and a carry bag - 250$.
Boo ya.


We went out for a steak dinner. . .a 5$ steak dinner. yeah in a land where a pumpkin is 25 $ A FLIPPIN PUMPKIN (* I was more than outraged) you can get a steak dinner for 5 bones.

and now I begin the rest of the evening in the fort constructed out of the two mattresses from our room into the middle of our living room. Yes we made a fort and I am more than aware that I am officially cooler now than i was when I was ten. We are far more resourceful and creative than when we were then. its called 'Bonnie Dun' and its from a really funny move called the castle, totally Australian and totally heart warming.

All in all. a good day and Love all around.
<3



Okay Ocean, you and I are gonna be good friends. . .I can tell. ^__^

Regrets.

Something happened yesterday.
Something i've never experienced before. Don't freak out mum and dad i'm alright, really it's not that bad. . .

Yesterday I tried the HOTTEST chili paste in my mouth. I mean it. . . all in the name of respect, honor and street cred
( which innit of itself (*did i spell that right?... can i put brackets in brackets . . . ) is the most valuable thing you can attach to your name really . . . accept maybe Dr.)
*** Those of you who dont know what "street Cred" is - let me illuminate you. Street cred or Street Credibility is like an instant cool, like once you say you've done it - whatever it is, you're instantly legit (legitimate - think legitimately coool) with me?

here's how it went down:

Im working with the owner of the place and two girls who are more senior than me. I = newbie and as such eager to make a good name for myself at work. soooo here it goes:

Owner: Hey Kate, you like chilies?
Me: No, not really.
Owner: Wanna take the chili challenge?
Me: . . .
G1: dont. do. it.
G2: do it.
G1: dont do it. I'd never do it. its stupid.
G2: I did it and ill be honest it was the worst thing i've ever tasted.
Me: what do i get if i do it skeptical
Owner: respect.
Me: yeah ill do it.

And he hands me this spoon. just a small unassuming plastic spoon, no different than one you'd find at any coffee shop (or sconewitch) with a a shallow little bowl on the end. a spoon whose sole purpose was to be used as a paddle in a coffee for 3 seconds. . . just a tiny plastic spoon.

not today.
not this spoon.
OH NO, this little spoon held a drop on it. no bigger than the size of any standard opening to a mustard twist-top top. the liquid was a dark red, dark dark red and slightly brown.

Relief at the size of the drop was instantly replaced with fear as; with all things in life, the smaller means the deadlier the serum.
I tentatively raised the spoon to my mouth -
- Dont! dont let it touch your lips. trust me.
Tongue out. one lick, two licks to get it all.
pause
heat
HoT
TiNgLe
FIRE
F I R E
F.I.R.E!
PANIC
PAIN
at this point my face has turned the colour of gazpacho and tears are starting to roll down my cheeks
DizZy
hands in the ice bucket and into my mouth
stomping on floor
DizZy
Chugging of Milk
more ice
more milk
DizZy
Heavy breathing followed by my three companions Milk, Ice and of course - DizZy.
Sitting in the cold fridge at work with a 700 ML glass of whole milk and a handful of ice.
. . .
I eventually start seeing straight again and I weakly stand up to go to the bathroom and blow my nose . . . and maybe check my pants 0_o

I walked back into work and everyone sympathetically 'oooh'ed and 'oooooouu'ed.
it took about half an hour to calm down and every time i burped, a small fire goblin blew fire up my lungs and ribs and filled my belly again.
the rest of the afternoon i was plagued with a wierdo pain under the bottom few of the ribs on my left side. . . on the way home ( about 10 minutes) i had to stop and sit down and then kept walking. Then stop. Book it into a public bathroom to unleash the fire goblin in my belly into the toilet via my mouth. oh and the milk. I know im sorry that is really gross but that's what happened.
I went home and continued having the most intense and crazy pains in my upper stomach / lower ribs i've ever had, Luckily that man of mine is so smart and expertly insisted that I drink a lot of water. a lot. after an hour or so of the spasms, they stopped. nothing since.

now in retrospect I laugh but holy sweet mama that hurt.

It burned.
I puked.
Street cred acquired.
I Can Laugh now.
worth it.

Lets go surfin now everybodys learnin how come on a safari with meeee

YEAH! today is supposed to be 24 out so the gang is headed to the beach, we all have the day off so its lookin like a surfin safari hopefully! Nothing much to report so far. turns out that the job i was very excited for pays me basically peanuts and way less than the minimum wage so the job hunt continues. ill keep it for the moment as little money is better than none comming in but i am hopeful and possitive that I will find a well or better paying job. soon. after surfing.
Its funny to see how expensive things are here, example - pack of smokes (* I don't smoke but one of the boys does) are approx 17-20$ a pack. *barf* HOWEVER - pack of four lamb burgers - 5$. not too bad eh?
I was minorly yelled at at work a few times but it was NOT my fault - when australians say "kate" it sounds like "Kay-ay-t" witch also sounds like "mate" or "kay" so while im standing there someones going "kayt kayt KAYT" and obviously im not thinking they are yelling at me until. .. oh grumble they absolutely are.
*Delicious side note - at the smoothing juice place, you can make whatever you want to eat and drink basically and I made a fruit crush that was ice, blueberries, passion Fruit and watermelon. . . . welcome to heaven. a heaven with anti-oxidents in it. bliss.
Im starting to feel poetic about the ocean, its nice to have something to feel poetic about again. OH - they ahve these things on the beach called Blue Bottles. they are a small jelly fish type thing but with trianglular ish shaped butts that are full with a clear . . . something I assume is liquid and you not supposed to touch them. i've been meaning to ask someone but i think ill just look it up now. Donald got a piece stuck betweeen his toes and said that they went numb. .. must look into it.
Will post pictures soooooooon

Now that i'm farther away taht i've ever been, im sending all my love and even more and harder and further and with more conviction than ever.
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE

Must jet, I hear the waves callin

I Fell Asleep In an Endless Black See and Woke Up With That Big Ol Sun a Chasin Me.

HELLO FROM COOGEE!!!!
Hooray im here!
everything is going really well and i'm safe and sound!
The apartement is really cute and its half a block from the ocean.. . . hellooo heaven.
In the early morning I can hear the waves crashing on the beach, its pure bliss.
The apartement is called Sunny Side how nice is that

Stoked to announce that after 2 hours in the country that I have a job! wahoo!! Its a place called Mellonhead and its natural juices and the likes. lots of fruit and vegitables and they seem like really nice laid back people. they warned me that they get busy. . . .like buuuusssssyyyy and I assured them that that was nothing im not used to ( after fridays in the summer at sconewitch. . . ) sooo!
tomorrow at 10am (* right now where I am its 12:10 lunch time on thursday) is my first shift. mucho excited!
Jill and Donald have herd back from places too - Job City!

Man coffee is complicated here. someone got frustrated with me when I said " oh just regular coffee is fine" lets put it this way - A double double = short white with sugar.
REGARDLESS - I am happily sipping a tasty tasty coffee with the first job of the house in a tank top in october. I can walk to work everyday on the Beach and I think about the people I love in my life everyday.
La vie Est Belle.

Oh baby flap those wings

This is the song thats on my mind right now if you care to giver a listen on Youtube,

the group is Passion Pit and the song is Little Secrets

It really makes me excited and it will be what I'm listening to while I stride threw the airport looking like a proud little blonde sherpa. ^__^

Weeeelllllll this is it folks!

So long Ottawa and Hellllooooo Australia . . . well in a day or two. . . yes two. womp womp.

BUT! - I think i'm ready for the plane, I've packed my life into MPG and she is looking great, i've got my canadian flags sewn on to everything, I have a killer carry on bag ready including brain puzzles (*Thanks Mike and Helen >

Theirs only two last untied strings - the overwhelming knot in my throat of leaving my family, friends and love here and going far (*or in some cases farthER) away.

the second is not picking up sour dinos at bulk barn. . . rookie mistake.

Lucky for me that love travels and is in the hearts of everyone I leave. I know ill be back and then just think of the love in that room . . . love overload! LOVERLOAD!

I like the sounds of that

Happy Birthday Momma, your last birdie is flyin the coop!

Tootle -Ooo everyone! take care of yourselves and those around you! Be good, Be safe!

And now, I throw myself to the Wind. . .