Cupcakes for dinner - the life of a baker

Bakers Blog :

its nearly 8 pm.

im cuddled in bed.

Barely willing myself to stay up for another hour to get up at 2:45 am for work.

got my first 'bakers burn' today ; its a burn typically across the inner forearm of most bakers. hot Pans, ovens you know, the usual.

this morning this little birdie was kicked out of the nest of "shadowing someone" and into the terrifying world of "you do the morning bake and we watch and give help where needed"

scared. nervous. anxious and tightly wound.

goGo gO GO!!!

thinking thinking thinking

tripping over my words and darting around haphazardly like a misguided pinball.

lights fan oven proofer change croissant trays proofer cookies scones butter tarts muffins bean rolls turn overs croissants egg wash here maple honey oats oats OaTs!!!!

upstairs downstairs up down up down dishes mixes lifting lifting lifting.

are you okay?

huh? me? oh im fine *____* blink blink

i came home and sat down. that was basically it.

I try to quelle the anxiety and nervousness eating at my insides. telling myself tht I can do this. its a learning curve. it will get easier. . .

besides my lunch money from work which consisted of me eating cookies an coffee, tonight i crammed a mini rosewater cupcake into my mouth with a bottle of water (*not milk this late, it gives me weird dreams. . . i dont know whats funnier; the fact that i wont have milk because im conserned about dreams orrrrr the fact that 8 is now 'late'. . . )

cant do it. count it. im tapin out. 8:15 and call it. this little lady is off to lala land.

prayin to whom ever is out there - courage and victory tomorrow. thanks a bunch.

also nooot gonnna spell check this one so enjoy